In this fourth phase of the book life with full attention, we will start to explore the mind (citta).
Our mind shapes our day-to day experience. What we perceive to be real is actually shaped by our mind through several channels.
Expectations: When we experience something in the world, we do so by relating them to our pre-existing theories. We look at life from those theories as we experience it. When our experience and the expectations we have about them do not match, we can become frustrated or irritated.
Assumptions: Similarly, we assume things about the people around us, but more importantly about ourselves. Because we behave in accordance to these assumptions, they often end up becoming self-fulfilling prophecies. For example, by assuming you are an unlikable person, you mistrust others, who will pick up on this behaviour and become weary as a result. The tricky thing with assumptions is that we are largely unaware of them, even when they concern ourselves.
Predictions: Predictions can become self-fulfilling prophecies as well, the most clearly captured by the placebo effect. Our thoughts have a vedana (feeling) dimension. When we think we are stressed, we feel stressed, and actually become stressed. We are continuously predicting what could, should, might or will happen next, and are unconsciously turning this into reality as we go.
Pattern-matching: Our minds are ‘patterned’ by our history and conditioning. So, whatever we engage with (friendship, workplace, party, love affair), we understand it by fitting it into the pattern of what we have been and known. We do this to understand what it is we perceive, how we should feel about it, and what we should do. While we pattern-match continuously, it isn’t always appropriate to do so.
With these mechanisms, we cast a spell on reality and then wrongly perceive it as such. Mind creates world: the state of our mind dictates the state of the world.
The type of mind we have and world we create is a consequence of our environment. They come from our parents, what we see online, what the people around us value, our culture, which newspaper we read… The world creates us, and then we create the world. 🌍
Self-talk is self-creation, but the stories we tell ourselves are often incomplete. Like how the stories of two fighting friends don’t add up, so too does our own narrative only cover a fraction of what’s true. This story is the story of who we think we are.
Cultivating awareness of the mind
It’s hard to become aware of the mind (citta) because it is our point of view.
Cultivating mind-awareness requires a solid basis of awareness of the body and vedana. This allows us to take a step back from when we’re caught in a thought spiral and then observe the mind from there. To become aware of citta, our mindfulness needs to be stronger than the citta we are mindful of.
We are then able to notice the monologues in our mind, and realise that they are our stories, and our responsibility. We can start to analyse them, find out where they come from, what they are based on, and whether we can be sure they are true. 💬
When we don’t have this basis, trying to become aware of our thoughts will only add more thoughts. When mind-awareness makes citta appear worse, our mindfulness basis is still inadequate.
When you go for your mindfulness walk, try to observe what’s on your mind. What do you think about? How does it make you feel? Where do you feel it?
After establishing this mindful state, examine the thought itself. The following questions may be more or less appropriate, depending on the thought you have.
For ruminating thoughts (thoughts about something that happened, often involving other people):
- Are these thoughts true, what are the actual facts?
- Why could they not be true?
- Where does these thought usually lead me?
- What do these thoughts do for me? Do they confirm a self-image I have?
For sticky thoughts (thoughts that are hard to shake, not particularly involving others):
- What makes this thought sticky?
- What would happen if I let this thought go?
- Is this thought helpful or productive right now?
- Do these thoughts express a need that I am not aware of?
Then, return to awareness of the body, it’s movements, and vedana.
For this third phase, we will also introduce a dedicated mindfulness moment. This should be an activity you do daily, that doesn’t take too long and where you tend to be alone. For example, brushing your teeth or showering. Define when your moment starts and where it ends.
Approach the mindfulness moment it the same way as the mindfulness walk. Become aware of the body, it’s movement, and vedana first and only then try to tune into your mind. You can use the same questions listed above to investigate citta.
For this phase’s daily mediations, try to sit completely still. When some uncomfortable feeling arises, catch it, and observe it without responding. Then, you can follow this week’s focus schedule provided in the book:
- Day 1: start with a complete body scan, followed by an inquiry to your state of mind. Can you identify what mood you are in?
- Day 2: begin as in day 1 by establishing awareness of the body. Then ask yourself the following questions: ‘what makes me happy?’, ‘Am I happy now?’, and if not ‘Am I telling myself a negative story?’, ‘When I’m happy, what does that feel like?’ Ask, feel and pause. Then ask again. Drop a thought and then wait for any vedana to occur.
- Day 3: become aware of the body, and pay particular (observing) attention to what is distracting you. These can be thoughts, but also vedana.
- Day 4: become aware of a particularly unpleasant sensation in your body. Observe the narrative your citta produces about it.
- Day 5: observe vedana and citta, then let them go. You can make this process easier by letting go on the out-breath.
- Day 6: observe citta, but allow yourself to follow the thought. But, as you do, try to become aware of the breath as well, and later add awareness of the body as a whole.
- Day 7: be aware of your sensations and mind. Notice your inner naratives and where you feel them; do they express a need or value? Can you respond to that need in your meditation?
Fourth practice week
Elaborating on the modifications I proposed in my previous post; these are my aspirations for this phase of life with full attention:
Vedana diary
Whenever I feel a particularly strong vedana, I will note it down in my pocket-journal. Additionally, I will send myself a random reminder once a day to do the same. Again, I will write down (1) the sensation, (2) where and how I feel it and (3) what the sensation might try to tell me.
Daily meditation
I will follow the pointers provided in the book. Additionally, I will inquire how I feel after the mediation by answering (one of the) following questions:
- Where did I feel most tension?
- Where did I feel most relaxed?
- How would I describe my state of mind?
Mindfulness moment
The best mindfulness moment for me would be my morning shower. 🚿 For that, I added a new principle to my momentum cycle:
Whenever I take a shower, I tune in to the feelings of my body, followed by the thoughts in my mind, so I start my day mindfully.
Mindfulness walk
As said yesterday, I will walk to the local sports café for an espresso as a reward to motivate me to do it more often. Additionally, I will take the stairs when I arrive, and take those mindfully as well.
During the walk, I will get acquainted with observing thoughts by answering the questions mentioned before.
